Sail Away



That one time…My Father said “yes” to a fun filled family weekend sailing trip. Now, don’t get me wrong, there is something pretty lovely about sailing, just not sure if going with the whole family was really fun! At the time, my sister brought home a crazy university friend for vacation, who was scared of EVERYTHING, and who complained about EVERYTHING. We put our game faces on packed, and got into the car to the resort we were sailing from.

When we got to the resort, my Father broke it to us that he would not be going on the sailing trip, he was staying back on the resort to golf with some senators. No biggy. We were getting on a boat owned by an Australian business man and his wife. They had no kids. I was not too sure about this grand adventure, but my Mother was excited.

We all got on the boat and set off into the tropical sun, I remember vividly how beautiful the turquoise water was, and the warmth of the sun. We sailed for 7 hours, and then anchored off of a tiny deserted island. My Brother, Sister and I were put on a little boat with a tent and our stuff and told to head to the beach where we would camp. Everyone else would be sleeping on the boat, including my sister’s friend, who made a big stink about “camping”. I was grateful to get to the island, I had been violently sick off of the side of the boat. I did not have sea legs, nor would I ever get them.

We set up our tent, brushed our teeth and got into the tent. If you looked up, you could see the tiny crabs taking over the top of the tent, you could hear the thousands of them taking over the beach, it was just us, and the crabs. It was brutally hot, there was no breeze coming off of the ocean. We some how fell asleep.

When we awoke, we clamored back into the little boat and headed back to the sail boat for some breakfast. My breakfast lasted, exactly 2 minutes before I tossed it back into the ocean. I was again, violently ill. We had no pills for motion sickness. I just decided, it would be better not to eat. As the day progressed, my sister’s friend whined and complained more, making faces and commenting how disgusting the food was, and how the bathroom was tiny and disgusting. Yeah, way to make a lasting friendship with the hosts.

While the day ended, we left the boat for our tent again, grateful that it would be our last day. Some time in the middle of the night, havoc broke out on the boat.

The next morning, we all got back onto the boat, my Mother quietly announced that my Sister’s friend had broken the toilet on board. She apparently, decided to flush a tampon down, then broke the handle, causing backup…so everyone on board woke up, to well, gross stuff on the ground. Needless to say, we were told we had to set sail ASAP, as the cleanup would be extensive.

We made record time back to the resort. We filed off of the boat, and well, my parents attempted to repair the friendship with the lovely Aussies, but they weren’t receptive after having to clean up sewage sludge off of the floor of their boat. I don’t blame them.



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